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Body Language and Confidence

body language and confidenceDr. Amy Cuddy talks about the relationship between body language and confidence.  She challenges her listeners to ask, “What happens if you fake it till you make it?” If you pretend to be powerful, are you more likely to feel powerful? She demonstrates how tiny, easy, 2-minute exercises on changing your body language can have a significant impact on your mind and your actual performance in stressful situations.

“Don’t fake it til you make it, Fake it until you become it.”

In this video she explains the connection between body language and confidence.

Holly Scott, MBA, MS, LPC sees clients at Uptown Dallas Counseling. Holly is trained in the specialty of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and holds the position of Diplomate in the Academy of Cognitive Therapy. Holly works with clients to help them overcome challenges in their daily lives that may be preventing them from achieving happiness. She helps clients with stress management, depression, parenting, marriage counseling, and other mental health concerns. If you are looking for a counselor or therapist, explore this website to see if Holly may be able to help you. 

To make an appointment for therapy or counseling with Holly at her Uptown Dallas Counseling, you have the option of using the Online Patient Portal to register and schedule. 

Mindfulness and Meditation

mindfulness

Being Mindful Does Not
Have To Look Like This

Andy Puddicombe gives a wonderful TedMed talk on mindfulness and meditation.  He explains the purpose of mediation as enabling us to experience focus, calm, and clarity in our lives.  In his 10-minute video, he describes the basics of how to approach meditation as stepping back, seeing the thought clearly, and witnessing thoughts coming and going without judgment. By maintaining focused relaxation, we can allow thoughts to come and go, and NOT get distracted by the thought.  We learn to observe the thought and let go of our emotions attached to a thought.  Our goal is to let go of our story lines that run continuously in our minds.  By using mediation to step back and get a different perspective, we can change the way we experience things in our lives.

Here’s Andy Puddicombe’s TED talk.  Enjoy. 

 

Holly Scott, MBA, MS, LPC sees clients at Uptown Dallas Counseling. Holly is trained in the specialty of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and holds the position of Diplomate in the Academy of Cognitive Therapy. Holly works with clients to help them overcome challenges in their daily lives that may be preventing them from achieving happiness. She helps clients with stress management, depression, parenting, marriage counseling, and other mental health concerns. If you are looking for a counselor or therapist in t!he Uptown Dallas area, explore this website to see if Holly may be able to help you. 

To make an appointment for therapy or counseling with Holly at her Uptown Dallas Counseling, you have the option of using the Online Patient Portal to register and schedule. If you would prefer to talk with Holly to schedule an appointment, email HollyScottPLLC@gmail.com, or call 214-953-9366, to talk with her about your counseling needs. 

Nelson Mandela’s Words are Therapy

Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela had such a magical way with words.  Here is a SlideShare of some of his most therapeutic, inspirational quotes.

Songs and Family

songs family happy sadNPR’s Robin Hilton posted a question asking readers to think about songs and family.  She asks them to name a song that describes your family.  So many people responded with great ideas.  Here is her Question:

Question Of The Week: What Song Describes Your Family?
by ROBIN HILTON
November 18, 2013 5:31 PM
We need some help putting together next week’s show. Thanksgiving is coming up, and for a lot of you, this means you’ll be spending some close time with family. Maybe it’s more time with family than you want. Or maybe you can’t get enough of it. Either way, it’s an opportunity to reflect on the people in our lives and how they’ve shaped who we are.  This is where you come in. Tell us about a song that describes your family. It can be a happy song or sad, a literal or not so literal one. Whatever reminds you of your family. Tell us about the song in the comments section. 

Some of my favorite responses are:
Born to be Wild
You Can’t Always get what you Want
Why Can’t we be Friends?
Wizard of Ozsongs and families

What songs describes your family?

You can read and share your own thoughts here.

FRIDAY FUN POST: Weekend Reading Plans

For this week’s Friday Fun Post, I hope to start (and complete!) this book over the weekend:
friday fun post Proof of Heaven
PROOF OF HEAVEN, by Eben Alexander. (Simon & Schuster.) A neurosurgeon recounts his near death experience during a coma from bacterial meningitis.
 
Curling up with a good book and cup to tea is one of my favorite ways to relax and recharge.
Do you read or listen?  Paperback or Ebook? Fiction or non-fiction?

Holly Scott, MBA, MS, LPC sees clients at Uptown Dallas Counseling. Holly is trained in the specialty of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and holds the position of Diplomate in the Academy of Cognitive Therapy. Holly works with clients to help them overcome challenges in their daily lives that may be preventing them from achieving happiness. She helps clients with stress management, depression, parenting, marriage counseling, and other mental health concerns. If you are looking for a counselor or therapist, explore this website to see if Holly may be able to help you. 

To make an appointment for therapy or counseling with Holly at her Uptown Dallas Counseling, you have the option of using the Online Patient Portal to register and schedule. 

Building Self-Esteem

One way to measure your self-esteem.  A fun, easy exercise.

“Where do you want to go to lunch today?”  Do you often answer this question with, “I don’t care” or “I don’t know”?  Do you ever spend time thinking about what you want?  Tina Gilbertson, MA describes an easy “I like, I don’t like” exercise that can actually help you build self esteem.  Try it out, and see what you think.

self-esteem happiness
From the Good Therapy Blog by Tina Gilbertson, MA:

Holly Scott, MBA, MS, LPC sees clients at Uptown Dallas Counseling. Holly is trained in the specialty of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and holds the position of Diplomate in the Academy of Cognitive Therapy. Holly works with clients to help them overcome challenges in their daily lives that may be preventing them from achieving happiness. She helps clients with stress management, depression, parenting, marriage counseling, and other mental health concerns. If you are looking for a counselor or therapist, explore this website to see if Holly may be able to help you. 

To make an appointment for therapy or counseling with Holly at her Uptown Dallas Counseling, you have the option of using the Online Patient Portal to register and schedule. 

Convoy of Hope – TYPHOON RESPONSE

convoy of hopeIf you are looking for a way to help the people affected by Typhoon Haiyan in the Philippines, please consider donating to Convoy of Hope.  In the video below, Hal Donaldson, president of Convoy of Hope, reports from their command center in the Philippines about the work they have already done in the community.
Convoy of hope

You can follow an up-to-the minute report of their work with the survivors on their

For other ideas on how to send your support, I also like the recommendations from the folks at Rewire Me in their post, Join Us in Helping Typhoon Haiyan Victims

Holly Scott, MBA, MS, LPC sees clients at Uptown Dallas Counseling. Holly is trained in the specialty of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and holds the position of Diplomate in the Academy of Cognitive Therapy. Holly works with clients to help them overcome challenges in their daily lives that may be preventing them from achieving happiness. She helps clients with stress management, depression, parenting, marriage counseling, and other mental health concerns. If you are looking for a counselor or therapist, explore this website to see if Holly may be able to help you. 

To make an appointment for therapy or counseling with Holly at her Uptown Dallas Counseling, you have the option of using the Online Patient Portal to register and schedule. 

Life Goals: Are They Actually Distractions?

Your audacious life goals are fabulous. We’re proud of you for having
them. But it’s possible that those goals are designed to distract you
from the thing that’s really frightening you—the shift in daily habits
that would mean a re–invention of how you see yourself.
—Seth Godin
life goals and distraction
One of my favorite writers is Seth Godin, and I particularly this idea.  Do you think your goals are actually distractions?

Holly Scott, MBA, MS, LPC sees clients at Uptown Dallas Counseling. Holly is trained in the specialty of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and holds the position of Diplomate in the Academy of Cognitive Therapy. Holly works with clients to help them overcome challenges in their daily lives that may be preventing them from achieving happiness. She helps clients with stress management, depression, parenting, marriage counseling, and other mental health concerns. If you are looking for a counselor or therapist, explore this website to see if Holly may be able to help you. 

To make an appointment for therapy or counseling with Holly at her Uptown Dallas Counseling, you have the option of using the Online Patient Portal to register and schedule. 

Benefits of Sleep: it Cleans your Brain.

A new study from National Institutes of Health on the benefits of sleep shows sleep may actually clean the brain. Scientists have recently discovered a process by which the brain actually flushes toxins out of spaces between cells.  We are not yet sure of the significance of this information, but it may help explain why sleep and mental health are so closely related.  A summary of the study here, explains some of the findings.

benefits of sleep

Holly Scott, MBA, MS, LPC sees clients at Uptown Dallas Counseling. Holly is trained in the specialty of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and holds the position of Diplomate in the Academy of Cognitive Therapy. Holly works with clients to help them overcome challenges in their daily lives that may be preventing them from achieving happiness. She helps clients with stress management, depression, parenting, marriage counseling, and other mental health concerns. If you are looking for a counselor or therapist, explore this website to see if Holly may be able to help you. 

To make an appointment for therapy or counseling with Holly at her Uptown Dallas Counseling, you have the option of using the Online Patient Portal to register and schedule. 

Controlling Emotions: Is it possible?

This discussion about controlling emotions compares two different women’s reactions to the same event.

 

First Woman’s Reaction:  Take a Picture

controlling emotions

From Hannah Price’s collection, City of Brotherly Love

When photographer Hannah Price moved from Colorado to Philadelphia, she began to experience something new to her – catcalls from men on the street. After several catcalling episodes, she decided to take action.  She would either snap a photo of the man immediately; or she would talk with him about the incident, and then ask if she could make his portrait. Ms Price created a project called “City of Brotherly Love” from these photographs.

Ms Price states her project is not meant to be an aggressive rebuttal to the individuals in the photos. It is, she states, “just a way of trying to understand it. It was way for me to just deal with it on another level besides avoiding it. Sometimes it’s easier to … just respond….. you just start talking to people, you find out more about them than your initial [impression].”

To see the complete 17-photo collection, see the NPR blog post of Code Switch by Kat Chow.

Second Woman’s Reaction:  Send a Message

controlling emotions

Tatyana Fazlalizadeh’s original posters on Tompkins Ave. in Bedford-Stuyvesant, Brooklyn. (Stephen Nessen/WNYC)

Brooklyn artist Tatiana Fazlalizadeh’s response to her experiences in Brooklyn is very different from Ms. Price’s response with the photography project. She created posters with direct negative messages to the catcallers and posted them around her neighborhood.  Ms Fazlalizadeh states she can’t walk down her street without getting catcalled or harassed. “It happens almost daily to me where I get frustrated or annoyed or upset by something that someone has said to me or done to me outside on the street.”

Ms Fazlalizadeh used her posters to try and rally the neighborhood around her efforts to stop the cat-calling.  She hopes that by calling attention to the negative effects of this behavior, the men will change.

controlling emotionscontrolling emotions

Why the Difference?

Why does one woman feel okay to take photos and even have a conversation about the experience, and another woman feel anger and frustration?  Our individual responses to catcalls are a result of our thoughts about the experience. If we think: “wow, someone thinks I’m cute.”, “I still have it”, or “this is going to be a good day”, our response may be:  happiness, a big smile, a skip in our step, better posture.

If we think:  “that reminds me of my abusive former boyfriend”, “will he try to come after me?”, “they must think I am promiscuous”, our response may be:  fear, increased heart rate, hunched posture, a frown, anger.

I am not expressing approval of the long-standing phenomenon of men yelling things to women in public places.  My writing about this behavior is focused on the difference in the two responses, not a right or a wrong response.  I believe this is a perfect example of the Cognitive Model theory in action.  The theory is:
Our THOUGHTS about a SITUATION create our REACTIONS, which are EMOTIONAL and PHYSICAL.   In Cognitive Therapy, we focus on our THOUGHTS.  A few of the questions we may ask in therapy about our THOUGHTS are:
What are they? Are they true? How much do we believe them? How do we change them?  
 
Through training and practice, you can learn to control or change your thoughts that create negative reactions.  This type of training has been shown through extensive scientific testing to be an affective way to treat depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, and other mental health challenges.  My opinion on catcalling is that, for so many women, the experience generates extremely negative feelings; therefore, I do not like the behavior.  For further information and discussions on ending street harassment see Hollaback!.
Sources:
Stephen Nessen : Reporter, WNYC, Not Taking it Anymore: One Woman Talks Back to Street Harassers, Friday, April 19, 2013
Newshttp://www.wnyc.org/story/282239-not-taking-it-anymore-one-woman-talks-back-street-harassers/

Kat Chow, A Photographer Turns Her Lens On Men Who Catcall, October 17, 2013.

http://www.npr.org/blogs/codeswitch/2013/10/17/235413025/a-photographer-turns-her-lens-on-men-who-cat-call?utm_content=socialflow&utm_campaign=nprfacebook&utm_source=npr&utm_medium=facebook